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I realize we are all ONE, yet I still feel that I am an individual being. I feel such pressure to try to eradicate the notion that I am an individual. I try to force myself to see that I am the same being as everyone else. I have not slept a decent night's sleep in three months and have the worst kind of headaches and full body energy spasms because I don't know how to be "me", since I am told there is no "me". I no longer know how to "be" because my mind keeps coming in and saying "no, this is wrong, you are not enlightened, you are still believing that you are an individual". [LeonardJacobson.com]
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I’ve spent my entire life living for other people. Whatever someone needed, I was. I was best friend, sister, mother, and much much more to so many people. I lost myself in the service of others. The only place I found freedom was in my writing, but then others caught on that that’s what I was doing in my spare time, so then I took on the role of teacher. (Which I don’t mind so much because researching the art and technical aspects of writing is how I got to where I am today.)- - -
I guess I’m saying that after years of that, I don’t know how to be me. I don’t know what that means. I know some things I like, I know how I like some things to be done but I just don’t know who I am. [The New Australian]
I don’t know how to love me,
How can I set myself free?
Am I really that deserving?
To live so happily?
I don’t know what to do with myself,
I don’t know what to be,
I don’t know how to let go,
I don’t know how to be me.
[Carolyn Uhm]
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I don’t know how to reconcile who I am with who others think I am. I don’t know how to be me when others would prefer that I not, nor how to deal with the stress, hurt and alienation brought on by the feeling that whatever I am is just not good or loveable enough. I don’t know how to take all the pieces that make me “Tere” and make it all fit together. [A Mom, a Blog, and the Life In-Between]
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it's really hard for me to make friends, and i don't know why, before i was adopted i had lots of them. also it's really hard for me to have a boyfriend, all the guys that end up liking me.. i turn away from them. it's really hard for me. it seems that i've been away from people so long( being an olny child in all) i don't know how to be me in front of people. and it makes me really nervous. i have really good friends at church and all. When i'm around them i do fine but when they're not there, i don't know how to act. i'm also affraid to tell people what's wrong. every time they ask i lie and say i'm doing fine just so they can go away. iam really, really not happy. i am also sorry about not writing this all in order, anyway please give me advice. I really need some, noone i know seems to care about how i feel. So please help. [Ask helpmebrenda!]
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I can't do that, I can't be myself. Ask me to do anything but don't ask me to be myself. I'll be Queen Victoria but I don't know how to be me. [MuppetCentral.com]
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had tea with ray at sushi train tonight.
interesting.
my first proper 'date' with a 'stranger' since andrew broke up with me. it's weird. it's as if i don't know how to act. i don't know what to do. i don't know how to be me.
it's quite embarrassing actually...
he asked to see me next weekend... not sure about that one yet...
[thoughts extracted...]
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i'm afraid of you and being myself around you and that doesn't make sense. i feel sometimes so insecure, which you would never believe if i told you. and that is exactly why i cannot ever tell you this. but it makes no sense. i am insecure, and hide things from you like how i am constantly looking at the world as if i had a camera - angles and positioning, and i can never stop, it is always there, ever since i was little - and how i wish eating was more avoidable and how beautiful you are in the almost-light and that is why i turned off the lights, not because i wanted to sleep. and yet even though i am afraid of my body in some ways, and would never remove my layers myself, i don't mind when you peel them away. because that means you want to, and i'm not imposing myself. everyone loves us and i think the problem is i don't know what us means. i don't know how to be me but i am afraid of being us, and this grey area in the middle is appeasing nobody's need for gossip. [the sound of smiles]
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I couldn’t have said it better myself. Fellow Don’t Know-ers,
thank you for being so beautiful. When all else fails, I turn to How To Be A Person, but that’s just
me.
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