Lie #45 - somehow that . . .

. . . "I did not have sexual relations with that woman" defense never works as well as one might hope. I would almost say it isn't worth a decanter of warm piss.

Lie #44 - your in town

Vice President John Nance Garner once said that the vice presidency "isn't worth a pitcher of warm piss." Others believe he said "isn't worth a bucket of warm piss." Still others have quoted him as saying "a warm bucket of piss."

Not to digress, but I like to think that this Oscar Wilde of warm piss partial quotations used "bucket." This is because if you're like me you hate to think what would happen if you--or any cabinet member--walked into the cabinet room at the White House and saw an inviting pitcher on the table, you would not hesitate to pour yourself a nice glass of lemonade. This wouldn't happen if you saw, say, a galvanized steel bucket sitting on that well-polished mahogany table--you would assume that that was a bucket of warm piss.

Now to my point. John Nance Garner said this during The Great Depression, a time when the price of warm piss had fallen to all-time lows, not even a penny a pitcher--in fact the pitcher was worth more. But do you know what you would have today if you started with $5,000 worth of warm piss and let it compound for 200 years?

Need a shot of Southern Comfort while you think about it?

Five thousand dollars isn't a lot of money today, but stop and perform the caluclation: How does $20 million sound! You can buy a lot of pitchers of warm piss with that kind of money.

Why not start today?

The idea of compound interest is simplicity itself.

Lie #43 - Stoner is the state

Perhaps you saw the news story in Georgia that began thusly:

ATLANTA -- Georgia retailers soon will be banned from selling candy flavored to taste like marijuana to children.
Georgia Governor Sonny Perdue signed a measure into law Wednesday that bans the sale of "marijuana flavored products" to minors -- anyone under 18 -- and calls for a fine of up to $500 for each offense.
The measure takes effect July 1st.
It targets businesses that sell the candies with drug-inspired names such as "Kronic Kandy" and "Pot Suckers."
The law says the candies promote drug use.
Senator Doug Stoner pushed the bill in the senate. "I don't think that folks are aware--

Now hold on a minute. Senator Stoner? So, I called him up.

"You've really come up in the world since we last spoke," told him.

"Ah, well," he said humbly.

Wearing my cool t-shirt, I went over to his house and we put on the CD of "Where There's Smoke There's Cheech and Chong."

There certainly is.